Sept. 19 2002 - Minglings
Well, I had hopped for an influx of traffic from the radio show interview on the playboy channel, and we've had an increase, but really a very small one. Only about a 10% increase in traffic. Which is average for the amount of other advertising we've been doing alone over the last week.. so hmmmm. Ah well, things are still cruising along at a manageable pace.
We've been working our buns off. It's amazing, how with my depression, I can function really well in some areas, and not at all in others. It also, very much depends on the timing of things. The nice thing about working on the website. Is I can do it when I am up to it, and when I'm having a down day, or down hour, or, whatever, I can just let it be. Also, I only do what I can handle, Wolfe can take over most of it, and has. I pretty much limit myself to posing for pictures, taking pictures, and photo editing. Which are more creative than technical, and I find that is a good distraction for me. Provided I can call my own hours and cancel on a moments notice. Couldn't do it for a living, but can do it for our sites (they don't really earn us a living, unfortunately). I was able to concentrate enough to read my first book in months and months which was really nice. Again, an accomplishable task, because I am able to do it when I am able. At my lowest points in functioning... well, to give you an example. I didn't have a shower the other day, because a towel was laying over the bathtub edge, and then the bath matt was lying on top of that, and was damp. This became a logic problem I couldn't solve. Where to put the wet towel, where to put the wet matt, and then have a shower, and then put it back. It seemed insurmountable. Things like that will overwhelm me so much some days, that they will bring me to tears. I will feel ashamed to admit them, even to someone as understanding as Wolfe, will feel so sick about myself and my depression, then crawl back into bed to hide.
The other day I was feeling really up, and decided to go to a second hand store, on my own. Going out somewhere on my own, is maybe not something I'm totally ready for yet. I found myself at bus stops, confused, scared, overwhelmed and not knowing what to do. By the time I had worked my way home again I was miserable. It can be difficult to be a person who is used to being able to achieve certain things in life, and to not be able to manage sometimes even the simplest things.
I've started to pro-Domme again, which is something I've done in the past infrequently, and usually co-Domming with another experienced top. I've been in the BDSM lifestyle for 10 years, but mostly in a non-professional capacity. I say I've started, which means, I've built the pro-site, I've advertised, I've talked to a great number of submissives, and potential clients. I have made some contacts, and I finally have a session booked for this weekend. I had forgotten how much work is involved in the marketing end of doing this professionally! Ah well. I know given how things are for me, that it will be something I am going to be very picky about. Choosing only clients I like, have compatible BDSM interests with, and feel I may be able to make an ongoing connection with on a professional level. I want it to be occasional, stress-free, mutually fun, healthy, safe/sane/consensual (of course) and all that good stuff. Probably very occasional, I think maybe only a couple of clients a month, at least to start. Aya, who is also interested in doing work with me in that area, and shares my houseboy, is someone I will probably choose to co-Domme with often. I enjoy the process of co-Domming both personally and professionally, it's nice to have someone to share the experience with. I will probably always spend more time doing BDSM play for plays sake with non-paying interests, than with clients, but then, that's just my personality.
I'm bald again!
And call me crazy, but this is another one of those journal entries. Where I'm giving away loads of little preview freebies. We have taken SO many pictures. There are the camera snaps we took on the web-cam during the whole show the other night.
I have to say, it was a complete joy sharing the web-cam with my co-star, Aya. Aya is amazing, she could never take a back seat to anyone. In fact, in terms of being a camera diva, she often outshines me. She -loves- to act up, and is a natural flirt, on camera and off. She is incredibly photogenic. She is so much fun, and she loves BDSM, fetish, and dressing up, playing with wigs, shoes, etc, as much as I do. She is also, still, very much considering shaving her own head. We will let you know when she is ready to take the plunge, and hold an auction. I'm almost regretting bribing her with the idea of an auction to help her take the head shave plunge, because I'll be so jealous I won't get to shave it!!!! ah well, at least I'll be able to watch right?! I think anyone that wants to experience taking a beautiful young woman with gorgeous hair, and shaving her down to the skin, that -doesn't- bid in the auction to come, will be simply insane. It's an opportunity of a life time. I think it will live down in hair fetish history. Aya, is simple gorgeous. I think it will be the most erotic head shave I will ever witness. Okay, enough of my gushing. More pictures!
I blew the pictures from the cam show up to double their usual size, so those little mini's above are only a third of the ones going on the site. We did a clipper shave, then a wet shave, then a wig show. It was a real blast.
Besides the cam snaps, Wolfe also took some high quality pictures with the digital cam
Did I mention I had the world's hottest Barberette? I think I especially appreciated the oil massage at the very end of the shave... her hands against my scalp, and then, her breasts <moan!> I did not expect to have my oiled head sliding between those luscious tits. I also had my head lovingly pressed to her chest as she clipper shaved me earlier as well. Even though I was nervous, and chained up, I was really cooed and wooed over by Aya the whole time. Except for the very end, where she teased me a bit. But then, it may be her turn soon enough! ha ha!
If that weren't enough, today we took pictures at the laundry of all places. Both bald, and with wigs, and with my wild new outfit on, snakeskin boots, snakeskin dress, I was a dryer diva!!! We made head shave bald galleries, we made wig galleries, we made foot fetish galleries. We were quite the scene on the washers.
Here's more samplings...
Two different wigs, a black bob, and my newest long ash blonde (from my lovely wig benefactor)
Lots of pictures, lots of fun.Now, if that weren't enough. We photographed with a new model earlier in the day yesterday, before the live show. The model is a cross-dressing beauty, bev. Now, many people, unfortunately, don't have appreciation for cross-dressers, transvestites, or transsexuals, or others who for various reasons venture outside of the cultural limitations of their assigned gender. I find them as beautiful and erotic as I find both 'traditional/conventional' gender rolled women and men. One day, hopefully, I'll have a site devoted to those who don't fit into conventional gender roles. I have close trans friends, such as Butterfly (who is having surgery this month! Yay!) who are trans, and I have photographed butterfly for my websites before, and had some bashing style mail. So, if you don't like it, don't look at it. You are forewarned here. The very sexy bev, who has a very sexy shoe and stocking collection, and who loves to wear wigs as do I, and loves to play dress up and transform, as do I, was a fun and luscious girl model, and happens to have a very sexy penis. I don't care what you think about cross-dressing, this girl has a sweet girly round ass! which I had a lot of fun digging my heels and nails into! So, again, be fore-warned, if you have prejudices in that direction, galleries including bev, may also include an alluring mix of both girl bits and boy bits in one singularly sexy package.
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And, she let me where her gorgeous strappy black pvc heals.. hello!
Now, if that weren't enough, we're off to the country tomorrow for yet another photo-shoot.
Wow.
Literally hundreds and hundreds of pictures going up over the next couple of weeks. Enjoy!
XO
Katt
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