July 12th - Still Life.
Living
with depression is challenging. Right now
when I'm recuperating from such an all time low
I never really know what the day is going to bring.
Where my ability to cope is at, and what type of
reaction I'll have to day to day life events.
barbie
and Wolfe and other loved ones standing by
and being there for me, has made all the difference.
When I haven't been strong enough to cope with
the littlest things on my own, they've been there
to help me, and to encourage me, provide hope and
to pick up the slack when I'm unable to manage.
I've
also had some wonderful supportive email
from a number of site members and people who
read my journal, that has been very special to me.
I haven't written back to any of those emails,
and it's not because they're not important to me,
they are. But these days it's hard for me to answer
a ringing phone sometimes, never mind send off a
small letter of thanks. There is so much to do
with setting up the new place, and managing my basic
living tasks, that I have to let many things just fall by
the wayside for now, and email has been one of those.
So to those of you who have written, I sincerely
thank you. I can never get enough of that, it makes
all the difference to me.
The
big challenge now is mostly of a financial nature
and I have to just keep reminding myself, that money
isn't the be all and end all to life. Not being able to
work and not being able to do much on the site has
led to a substantial loss in income, and it's going to
get worse before it gets better. August is going to be
a very challenging month, I try not to worry about it.
Because working myself up is not going to helpful.
I
just keep reminding myself, that what really counts
is being alive. That there is a big beautiful world out
there, and I have beautiful people in my life that I
love and cherish. I may end up very poor in the pocket,
but rich in my heart... and that's where it matters.
Where it really matters.
Live in love...
XO
Katt