February 19

Well, when ever I get bored and restless I want to create erotic imagery.  One might imagine, that's why I have several adult websites going. <grin>. 
I think I prefer being the person taking the pictures, rather than the one in them, but when I'm the model I've got, then Wolfe and I work together, he does the photos, and I pose, and often I take pictures as well, for instance the one at the top is one of the ones I took last night.

Bored and restless, decided to do a shoot, and recruited Wolfe, maybe one of the reasons I always look so different shoot to shoot, is because I'm my own most easily available model, yet I want specific looks for whatever concept starts to brew in my mind.  So heavy eye liner, and lipstick, black pearls and lots of curls were the order for the day yesterday.

This one Wolfe did. He's a mighty fine photographer. 

I think I have a tendency to prefer my own work when I'm the subject matter, because I'm more critical of my appearance than he is.

Or maybe I just get a very fixed image of what I want the picture to look like.  

 

When I take the photos, since we don't have a tripod, I literally take them at arms length. When I take them then I can see what I look like through the view finder on the camera. That way I get the shot exactly how it is in my head. It does lead to some interesting poses, and certainly makes objects closer to the lens look larger than life.
I don't know about you, but big breasts in the face, is a perspective I enjoy, though I prefer when they are someone else's! 

I had another BBW model potential lined up to meet the other day, but had to cancel, struggling with my depression a fair bit these days, and grieving the passing of my grandmother.  

It's hard to go out and do much.  I was originally planning to go to a local BDSM munch tonight, but I'm just not up to it.  I want to go to the play party on the weekend, so I'm hoping my mindset improves for that.  I'm really looking forward to it, so I'm pretty certain I will make this play party.  

It's raining out today, if you couldn't guess from my little umbrella's in the background.  It rains so much in Vancouver though, that I can't possibly have little umbrella's every time it rains, or the background dressing would get rather passé.  Since it's one of my favorite things about the pillow book, my ever growing collection of backgrounds, this is a legitimate concern <grin>.

I really love doing web design in general, I'm going to spend most of my day today working on a local photographer/leather workers website, he's making me a leather corset, which I'm rather excited about.  Both of us have been rather busy though, so we'll see how the timing of it works out.

I'll post all the links and stuffs, when It's all nice and new and done with my design.  Cause it's all about me you know <wink> JOKING!

Well, not joking too, I *know* I'm an attention slut, otherwise why would I have a public online journal, plastered with photos of moi, my words, my thoughts.  But really, it's a small part of my personality, and I'm honestly more interested and more curious about other peoples than myself.  People fascinate, intrigue, and captivate me.  Hence my unhealthy fascination with 'reality' television.

Right now I'm warring over little inconsequential things, whether to stay inside, naked and lazy all day, or now that a cheque has finally come in and we have a little bit of money going out and doing some shopping, necessary and/or frivolous shopping.  Could use some groceries, and I want to pop into a store in Chinatown and pick up a little pot for my orchid that Wolfe bought me for Valentines.  Oh, just remembered something that decided it for me, I have to get my prescriptions for my anti-depressants filled, and the pharmacy is across the street from the place that has inexpensive and pretty pots, so that's decided.

Nightmares last night, won't go into details of them, but they had to do with my childhood, and when I was a child, I had a nervous habit of picking my nose when stressed, to the point where it would bleed.  Well, lately when I've had really bad nightmares, I pick my nose in my sleep, this morning (er, early afternoon) when I woke up almost all my fingers on both hands were caked with dried blood.  If it gets any worse, I'm going to be sleeping in mittens.

Enjoy what I do here?  Help support my web endeavors, Join Erotimania to see more of our erotic photography collaborations, or simply pass on a donation, no amount too small! or just browse my sites and surf my sponsor links (there's a little list at the bottom of the links page attached to this site).  It's these little things that keep me going, and keep me in toilet paper!

XO
Leila

 

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