January  12

Well, so much for a photo shoot at the girls today.  Somehow I managed to sleep till 5pm, and when I did get up Wolfe said he really wasn't in the mood to shoot today anyways, so we didn't make any arrangements to go over. I rolled out of bed and had a leisurely breakfast/dinner and slumped lump like in front of the TV for two hours.  Which brings me up to now.

This is why I'm not holding down a job.  Somehow sleeping in until after closing time, would not be looked well on.  It's no luxury, it's a blight, I wish I was more functional, and my highly fluctuating symptoms of depression can be maddening at times.  Most of my depression I've suffered with not being able to sleep, and I can honestly say that is worse than the over sleeping I'm doing now, but this extreme sleeping is not really pleasant either.

So what can I write about two hours of television and a night of un-translatable weird disjointed dreams?  Well, understandably, not much.  

So I'm going to bugger off and go play a role playing style game Wolfe's been obsessing over lately, and just got me hooked on - Morrowind.  Luckily, I don't get too taken by these things, I haven't the patience to stick with most games obsessively.  I enjoy the game though, it's slow paced, and again, it's landscape and ambiance fit my mood right now, it has a misty grey dreamscape quality to it.

Actually, now that I think about it, It probably influenced a lot of my dreaming last night, which was filled with similar fantastical creatures as the game.

Hope they appreciate the free publicity and don't sue my pants off (not that I have much other than a large collection of kinky toys, that's worth anything <laugh>, that's one estate auction I'd like to see!)

So that's all for today, a lot about nothing, and some RPG images, ah well, it can't all be great literature ;) I haven't got the ability right now to do some intensive soul searching, so surface is what it is.  The thing about me, is it can all change in the blink of an eye.

Leila

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