The last couple of days I’ve actually managed to DO stuff! Yay! On teusday I had my psych appointment, they’re increasing my seroquel to try and help me fall asleep at night. The Dr. is amazed that what I take now doesn’t knock me out for 3 days solid. But hey, that’s my mucked up bio-chemistry.

After that I went to the STD clinic, I have Molluscum Contagiosum which are tiny little pimple like viral bumps. You can have them as an STD or just from general contact, you can pick them up from hot tubs and toilet seats too (joy) and since I haven’t actually been having sex, the Dr. figures I probably picked them up from one of those creepy alternate sources, they are actually mostly on the inner backs of my thighs, which then would even make sense. Don’t worry I am never sitting directly on a foreign toilet seat again. They are quite common, usually go away on their own between 6 months and a couple of years if you don’t treat them, but they can also spread rapidly over your body untreated too, so I’m getting them burned off with liquid nitrogen. I now have icky blisters, and get to go back next friday for a second going over if any survived.

Then, I went and got my nails done, yay! I now have lovely long red nails, with the polish happily nested under a baked on gel coat - no chipping!!!! Why I wasn’t doing this years ago I don’t know, I love the fake nails now, and only hope typing will get easier with time and practice. It seems to be slowly doing so.

Then we went and bought some presents for neices and nephews, still shopping to do, but the bulk taken care of.

Then yesterday we went to see Harry Potter, finally, it rocked. After that a bite of sushi and home.

Today, I managed to catch up on photo editing, and finished shopping for neices and nephews.

Not much left that needs to be done for Xmas, gifts for my inlaws, and some chocolate to buy for my mother, she likes the 99% dark, so bitter, not many people like it, but she adores the stuff.

I go back to my Psych dr. next teusday, and he is looking into a day program for me, which is kind of scary, it’s essentially like partial hospitalization, I’m just not getting better. I may end up doing electroshock which would likely be in tandem with partial hospitalization anyways. Day program scares me, lots of mixed feelings over it. Hopefull that it might be helpfull, upset at the stigma, despair at thats how bad I am, worried that I won’t be able to get myself there.

And I desperately need to go have my hair re-dyed, my roots are showing. I can be the crazy depressed relative at Xmas, but I want good nails and hair… they make me feel ’safe’ - like I’ve got my together ‘mask’ on.

We’re renting a car Xmas eve, Xmas day and overnight with the Inlaws, then over to the Island to visit with my family till new years. Boxing day dinner my family is going to do make your own sushi, which I love. All the ingredients on the table and everyone just makes hand rolls of their favorite stuff.

Wolfe is making dinner now, simple shake and bake pork chops and some wild rice from a package, simple but yummy! my tummy is growling.

XO
L

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